info@endabuse.com; Psalms 51:12, Isaiah 55:1, John 6:54, 2 Timothy 2:22, James 4:7 Brandon: It’s one of those things where, you know, you’re doing the wrong thing and you just feel like you can’t help yourself and can’t get out of that despair. That’s the whole point. The start of the addictive cycle is despair. And despair can be lots of different things. Despair is not necessarily what you think, in the way of discouraged or depressed. Despair can be loneliness. Despair can be boredom. Despair can be guilt. There are so many different things that would fall under the category of despair, right? And then there’s a trigger. Right? So, you get triggered from the despair. Then there’s the fantasy. So, the trigger can be cleavage. The trigger can be a commercial. The trigger can be a magazine sitting on the rack as you go by, you know, and you’re in this despair, you have this trigger. So then there’s the fantasy and then there’s the acting out. After the acting out, you despair. The guilt and white knuckling mindset of, I’m not going to do this anymore, and I’m going to white knuckle it until I get in that despair again, and then there’s a trigger and, you know, so that was one of the things that helped me a lot with counseling, getting into counseling and understanding the addictive cycle. It was the Lord pursuing me. It was the Lord showing me these things. You have a bigger problem than looking at porn. Your bigger problem is you’re not looking to me. So, just not looking at porn is not going to solve it. I mean there’s Buddhists and Hindus and all these people that are so pure in their way of living and not contaminating their minds and being at peace or whatever. So, they’re way more disciplined than most Christians and conquered their selfish desires and all these things, but they’re not walking with Christ. They’re not walking in the light. They’re in the dark. So, the point is not to just not look at porn, right? The point is to be satisfied in Christ and so the Lord is like, okay, yeah, the triage, we’re going to stop the bleeding and you know, your wife now knows and so she’s going to help you and you’re going to have some boundaries. I needed that time. I needed the understanding, the destruction of what this is doing, right. And obviously, I knew it was wrong, but all the things that we say to ourselves is that it’s not hurting anybody. It’s just between me and God and I know I’m sinning, but it’s not hurting anybody else. Wendi: I’m extremely thankful that you have overcome the sex addiction and I’m thankful that you are willing to open up about it here and because I know there are so many people that watch us that have been, you know, affected by people who did not stop and get help. They made it to level three and four and and so you know, and there’s so much damage and you know, and so thankfully that was something that you recognized and like you said, you know, the whole getting busted, was God’s way of rescuing you from that pit that you were in. And so I know that that if there is anybody that is listening to this or struggling, and they need any kind of resources, you can definitely email us and we will get you in touch with Brandon who can get you some direction in that because I know in just watching you I’ve seen the change up close and personal and I know that you don’t struggle like you did.